For way over a year, the big question has been “What will Rachel do?” Of course this is a common question for incoming high school seniors, but the answer and discussion is far more complicated when you have an intellectual disability like Down syndrome. I’ve written a couple of blogs on this topic, and I believe there are several more installments needed, and promised I would keep all of you in the loop. We now know what Rachel will do next year.
Nineteen years ago, Rachel was about a month old. We were living in a Memphis suburb. By choice, we had a prenatal diagnosis. There was no social media. We had started early intervention services with Special Kids and Families, and had met Ben and his family. Even with a prenatal diagnosis, we still had more questions than answers. Truly though, no one can predict with certainty what any child will become.
Let’s set the stage: Rachel was born healthy with no heart defect. She had good muscle tone. We had an awesome early intervention program with the best imaginable therapists. An important piece of our early intervention services was the parent training component. This is where I learned special education law, about parental rights, and resources for transition. That information has served Rachel and others well over 19 years. We also had and have an amazing support network of friends and family who have embraced Rachel and us.
Nineteen years ago, we couldn’t have imagined that Ben and his family would become more like family than friends, an eternal blessing. Then, people weren’t talking about college for students with Down syndrome. Then, people were telling us not to save money for our kids because of ridiculous laws. Then, we were hearing how inclusion was the exception and not the rule in certain schools including the one Rachel would attend.
Being avid readers, we even wondered if Rachel would be able to read. A well-meaning waitress told me “She might even learn to read if you send her to a special school.” I was mortified. If you have followed our journey, you know that when we learned she had Down syndrome one of my first thoughts was she would never go to our beloved University of Arkansas.
Nineteen years later, the landscape is different. Rachel is quite the avid reader and in many ways just like every other 19-year old high school graduate. Over the past few years, we visited many post-secondary programs. Our beloved University of Arkansas launched a program, EMPOWER, just this year. After each visit, she embraced each program and the food choices offered at the respective campuses. She had the following hashtags at one time or another:
#futureVandygirl
#RockChalkRachel
#thislittlepigsgoingtoAR
Of course, her dad and I were pulling for Arkansas, but for many reasons I’ll elaborate on in a different blog, that door seemed to close. About that time, I accidentally learned about a new program at Missouri State University Bear Power. Missouri State is in Springfield and is less than a three-hour drive from our home. I spoke to the director and my gut told me this is a good fit for Rachel. We talked to Rachel, and when she heard “strong musical theatre program” and your “guy friends from Fuge camp go to school there,” she was eager to check it out!
She applied. She interviewed. She was invited to the “leadership retreat.” Then, like many of her friends, she received “The Letter.” If you haven’t seen it yet, click here to see her reaction to the letter saying “you’re a Bear.”
Rachel’s Missouri State Acceptance Letter
More than once, I have thought back to that February 5 day when we learned she had Down syndrome and God has reminded me of how He has kept His promise from Jeremiah 29:11. Still, I must admit a little piece of me grieved that she wasn’t going to Arkansas, and I’m sure that would have been the case if she didn’t have Down syndrome, too.
A few months back Jonathan wisely said, “19 years ago we didn’t think we would have any options. Options are good.” That makes me smile. Nineteen years ago, I didn’t know if she would be able to read. Today, she’s going to be a Missouri State Bear. #GoMaroon
#Godisgood
#Options are good
#TrustMamaBearsGut
#weregonnaneedsomeBearWear
And, I’m taking suggestions for her new hashtag. #BabyBeartoMissouriState
Author’s Note: I’ll be writing a few more blogs about post-secondary programs, the transition to adult process and some of the challenges families of students with intellectual disabilities face.
